7 Things Your Daughter Should See You Doing
As a mother, you hope as your children grow older, that you’ll see something in them – in their character, in their decision making, in their behavior – something that lets you know you got it right. Something that reassures you that the mistakes you made along the way weren’t detrimental. I know. Me too! And my oldest child is only 8.
Not a day goes by that I don’t consider what I do, what I say, the decisions I make, and wonder how those things affect my children now, and how they’ll affect them in the years to come. When it comes to my girls, I’m overly concerned with how I’m doing as a mom just because they are literally my shadows. They’re watching my every move – even when I don’t think they’re watching – and just like your daughter is watching your every move. So, knowing that we have an audience, why not make sure that the next re-enactment of Life with Mom plays out like a box office hit instead of a cringe-worthy B-list movie you wished you’d never starred in?
If inspiring others to become Virtuous Women is your goal, then there are some key things your daughter should see you doing. There are seven in all, but I’ll let you process the first four and circle back with the remaining three in tomorrow’s post.
So…what should your daughter see you doing?
1. Spending time with God. Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. (Joshua 1:8) How does your child know you value your relationship with her? Probably because you spend time with her. How does she know that you value your relationship with God? Do you say it with your life or just with your words? We can tell our children all day long that we love them, but if our actions never show it, we end up with broken relationships built on nothing more than lip service. The same goes for our relationship with Christ. If we expect to uphold godly standards, and to make God believable to our children, then we need to be intentional about spending time in prayer and studying his word – and making sure our girls see us doing it.
2. Serving (God and others). As mothers, we give so much of ourselves every day; and I know some days it feels like we have nothing left to give. But on the days when I’m physically and mentally exhausted, I’m always amazed by how God manages to stir up within me the strength to do what he’s called all of us to do, and that’s to serve. There’s an indescribable joy and sense of fulfillment that comes with serving God and serving others. Maybe it’s the feeling of being part of something that’s bigger than me, which is what I want my girls to experience. Let’s help our girls see that life isn’t all about them and what they want, but it’s about serving the Lord with gladness (Psalms 100:2) and extending a helping hand to the poor and opening their arms to the needy. (Proverbs 31:20). Let’s show them what it means to have the heart of a servant, following Christ’s example in that he came not to be served, but to serve. (Mark 10:45)
3. Taking care of your husband. (Not your live-in bae). I might invoke some virtual side eyes with this one, but you’ve got to know that I’m going to hit you straight every time – and it’s all in love. Yes, we live in a time when cohabitating is the accepted norm, but if we’re going to raise daughters who uphold godly standards, then we must set the standard and leave giving the royal treatment to the man who sees us as royalty – not bae from around the way. Our daughters should see us investing in the husband that God has hand-picked for us. They should see us nurturing him and making sure his needs are met. They should see us protecting him spiritually by praying for him and with him. They should see us protecting him emotionally – building him up and guarding him against foolishness (and that includes foolish people). They should see that we, like the Virtuous Woman in Proverbs 31, “greatly enrich his life; bring him good, not harm” all the days of our life. (Proverbs 31:11-12). In doing this, we help our daughters better understand God’s vision for marriage and the importance of honoring your calling.
4. Taking care of yourself. How can we teach our daughters about value and self-worth if we don’t show them what that looks like by taking care of ourselves? We can’t get so wrapped up in caring for everyone else that we lose sight of our own needs, because doing so ultimately makes us ineffective and incapable of giving our very best. So, take care of you. Get your hair and nails done every now and then. Hit the gym -- or the living room floor-- for a workout. Allow yourself some time to mentally withdraw from all that’s going on around you (just don’t COMPLETELY check out on us, okay? K!). Take care of yourself emotionally by avoiding people who don’t bring out the very best in you. Buy yourself a new outfit – one that compliments you and shows that you care about yourself…and that you know your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. (I Corinthians 6:19) Proverbs 31:22 tells us the Virtuous Woman dresses in fine linen and purple gowns! So go ahead, girl! Follow her example. Love on yourself and show your girls how it’s done.
Check back tomorrow for part two of this post. In the meantime, click the share button and help me build up the Kingdom one Virtuous Woman at a time! I'm starting with mine. Love!!